My breaking point
my mind is telling my yeah! but my body is telling me no!
I want to start by saying that this Blog is not to show off that I work hard and that getting to where I got is a good thing, it's not, my purpose is to warn every one about the dangers of over working your self without noticing it.
It's been almost a month since the IGN convention, my ambition was on an all time high, and nothing could stop me!
But here is the thing, I work every day in a high stress job from 6 AM to 6 PM as civil engineer, so I have to stay on high alert all the time, as dropping the ball could literately lead to a disaster.
So I put my brain on over drive and worked the game and the job at the same time on full power, creating new features for the game while creating new walls for the mall we were building, and here is the thing, it worked! the progress on the game was huge while still maintaining a great job output.
Until yesterday, I was in a meeting and some sort of numbness crept up on me, and I could feel my heart racing even though I'm just standing there, my hearing turned into a slight buzz and my sight turned into a black static, I lost my balance and had to sit for about 5 minutes before connecting back to reality and regaining my normal blood pressure.
I'll spare you the details and just call it a severe panic attack that was most likely caused by over working the brain to it's maximum limits, most likely my body had given me enough warning signs but I didn't notice them in the high of feeling unstoppable.
So in conclusion, please take care of your self and take a moment to listen to your body, you may think you're invincible now, but that won't last if you don't respect the most precious machine in your toolkit, your own self.
If you feel a very slight numbness in your hands and body, feel a bit disconnected reality and not being able to put things together and focus, JUST STOP, completely stop what ever you are doing and just breath, take your blood pressure reading and make sure you are alright before anything else.
It's been exactly 1 year and a half since I started my journey as a game developer, I believe in my vision and my self, but I may need to take it slow for now, to continue marching forward but on a more healthy pace.